Local Chef Justifies Price Hike by Putting ‘De-Constructed’ in Front of Everything on His Menu And Serving It All on Household Tat


A Brighton cafe has upset regulars by replacing traditional favourites such as a plate bangers and mash in favour of de constructed fish fingers served on a paving slab.

Despite the dismay of some long standing customers, the move has seen hipsters queuing round the block to sample the new menu at Tony’s Cafe on Western Road. The move has been heralded a triumph by Brighton ‘foodies’ who are only too happy to part with an extra five pounds per dish as long as it’s not served on a plate.

Meals such as…

Bangers and Mash

Steak and Ale Pie

& Chicken Curry

have all been consigned to history and replaced with modern classics such as

De-Consrtucted Bangers and Mash served on a beach towel

De- Constructed Steak and Ale Pie Served in a Vase

& De-Constructed Chicken Curry served on a DVD case.

Tony, who has owned the cafe for the last ten years, said something needed to change, ‘We were struggling so we needed to mix it up’ he said. ‘My good wife Tracy was watching some shite on the telly where they were serving grub on a slate and I said I will have a bit of that! So I replaced the plates with a load of old tat from around the house, chucked the price up a fiver a dish and started calling everything de-constructed. The next thing I know I have got kids with massive great holes in their ears, all puffing on them smoke boxes queuing round the block. They are lapping it up. Poor Tracey is struggling with the serving the de-constructed fish fingers on paving slabs as its hurting her back but she won’t be moaning when she’s sipping Sangria in Bennidorm’ he gleamed.

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